All the Censusfails.

So many of them.


I think the census is a very important and worthwhile gathering of information.


I was having a read of The Register, which is so British that it constantly mocks Australia for having a crap govt, and a frequently equally inept opposition, and deservedly so.

Look at this beautiful, beautiful code IBM gets to ,see every time you click resume:

I found that here:
IT analyst: Oz census data processed as plain text



Oz Guvermint cut $68m from ABS (note: citation needed) and outsourced everything to IBM, who are great at everything.

Predictably, shit happened.  Consequently, everyone was fired, except they weren’t.  Because it was all IBM’s fault, right?  This is reassuring.

So anyway, I’m just gonna dump a whole bunch o’ links here then:

Oh yeah, and on Aust Govt, corruption & IT ineptitude in general:




Slowtime, in a thick layer of Adobe

“Urgent Call to Action!”

Quickly, uninstall Quicktime immediately!  AUUUGHHH!


Oh wait, don’t!  Adobe Cloud Emergency!  You’ll destroy everything!
(that page is really crap and buggy by the way, reloads every 0.2 seconds).

Don’t worry, Adobe will get around to fixing everything, eventually/soon.



Because they’re aware it’s a bit of a problem, being hackable and stuff.

But it’s not their fault!  They swear!  Their parents divorcing and everything.  Ugh.





Ouch! My brain! Google AI tries to fry our minds.

Yeah, yeah, you’ve all seen this before, but you’ve probably seen it sober.


For a REAL trip, try looking at this stuff while in an altered state of mind.


Like, wow, man.


…. Sorry, I zoned out for a minute there.

What was I saying?  Ah yeah.  It’s a vast Google conspiracy, I’m sure, that they’re programming their AI to totally mess with our feeble brains.

“Google’s AI on LSD: what a robot’s dreams look like”

Evil bastards.  Instilling fear and derangement in us all.

“Dive deep into the trippy, terrifying art produced by a computer’s artificial brain”

Really, the void is staring back at us, Chtulu-like, and it doesn’t like us one bit.

Oh, you think this harmless experimental fun?  You want to live in a world overrun by hallucinated mutant hyenas?

Fancy rampant eyes appearing in place of your nipples in your snapshots at the beach?

Do you value your sanity at the supermarket?

You still think civilisation is safe?


How about your pets?


How about drugging up your favourite drugged out movie while on drugs?

“‘Fear & Loathing In Las Vegas’ Turns Even More Nightmarish Overlaid With Google’s Deep Dream Software”

“Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas run through Google’s Deep Dream neural network is pure nightmare fuel”


Because it should be pretty clear by now just how much Google hates you and wants to destroy you.


They’ve even released the source code, FFS!
“Interactive Deep Neural Net Hallucinations (+source code) – Large Scale Deep Neural Net visualizing top level features”

How are we still sane?..

Are we still sane?..

We still sane?..

Still sane?..





Linux. Sounds like a floor covering. Looks like old Windows.


So!  Let’s install something that is an alternative to Windows 10, which watches you pee, or sees you pirate Kanye songs, or something.

Because this is a geeky thing to do, it will involve penguins, because that’s what geeks do, reference mascots and do memes and stuff.

Here’s a penguin:


Very clever.

So here’s a young man talking about Linux Mint, and why it’s vastly superior or comparable to Windows 10, yuck:

Windows 10 vs Linux | Linux Mint 17.2 Impressions by InfinitelyGalactic

And here’s why his favourite flavour is Mint:

Linux Mint MATE 17.2 Review | Linux Distro Reviews by InfinitelyGalactic

And here’s a penguin to break up the page a bit, for entertainment purposes:


No, that’s a cat.  This is very funny.  Where was I going next?  Ah yes, here:


No, here:

How to install Linux Mint via USB

Or alternatively, here:

Install any linux from a usb the easy way by pac-man

In which one does things.  Like install this thing, to help you install something:

UNetbootin ( allows you to create bootable Live USB drives for Ubuntu and other Linux distributions without burning a CD.)  And has features.

More penguins.



Oh, and here’s Linux Mint, for downloading and installing, twice if you like.

Must fly:


Lolz!            Penguins can’t fly.



Editing video like a lazy fox

Sometimes, when one is strapped to a desk and is compelled by evil forces to edit video, one is also strapped for time, for money, for common sense and for technical ability.

If, like me, you are screen-illiterate, what can one do?  Besides flail?  I’ll tell you.  Lean close.  Closerrr.   CLOOOSSEERR.  That’s too close.  Move back a bit.  Thank you. :

By taking shortcuts.


And substitute other people’s stuff as your own.

Shutup!  It’s legit!  This is the net / the modern workplace / Sparta / an old joke.


Okay, so here’s some stuff for Adobe Premiere Pro Creative Suite 6 CC Reader Update Restart Your Computer BDOS Argh:

21 Broadcast Graphics Templates for Adobe Premiere Pro by Stern FX

Free Intro Templates (Sony Vegas Pro 10; Adobe Premiere Pro) Auto Beat Edit

And free musics and noisesomes here.

You can thank me by dreaming of me alone in your bed tonight.  I know you will.  Don’t, we barely know each other.  Good luck in your happy editing!


Social Mediocrity

We all use those sites.  You know the ones I mean.  Their mediocrity is so banal I’m not even inspired to think of a punchline.

So here’s a picture of two grinning horses:


Nice.  So anyway, on one of these sites, I was called a white knight.  I’m not sure what that is, but it sounds delicious.


Hungry now.  I think I was defending an online acquaintance who happened to be a girl.  So I guess I deserved it.

Anyway, all the lads, rednecks and bogans who proliferate on those sites are complaining they can’t harass people on them effectively any more and keep getting into trouble.  I’m not linking to a BrightBart page,

brightbart but that’s a big current thing with Milo drinkers or something.


Thirsty now.  I digress.  So they, along with the normal people they harass, are looking for alternatives where they can express themselves freely.  As am I.  Away from them.

Some of these alternatives look better than others.  Faurbes has a very old page which suggests some.


Here are some, then, he wrote abruptly, coming to the point at last, in the way of so many second rate blogs, and with similar, disjointed, oddly-phrased syntax: =

and these look pretty frikkin’ dodgy to me.:

So there you go.  Dig in, friends, and have ye any alternatives to these alternatives, do let us know in the comments below.

alice_teeth Smiley face.